Why does the average person my age connect to TV shows like “Friends”, and “Sex and the City”? I suppose it is because deep down we each desire for a deeper heart connection. After all, the average person who moves to a city like New York and Los Angeles leaves their hometown, their family and the life he or she was accustomed to chase their dream or fortune. There is noting like waking up one morning in a strange city no matter how awesome it is, and feel completely alone.
Then there is the first time you go home to visit family and friends and realize that the life you were once a part of is no longer home. You discover that somewhere along the road, your new city life became your home and your destiny. No one can understand this sense of belonging except someone who also made the same transition to the city. You begin to long for a new family of sort, one who is on the same journey as you are, who also understand the joys and struggles of the city.
New York City had been such a place for me. I left everything I knew to pursue my dream. And while I was still chasing that dream, I fell in love with the city, the people, and my life there no matter how difficult it sometimes got. It became my home and I could not imagine loving any place more. Because this was a place I had come to on my own as a bachelor. I wanted to become a part of the city and the community.
It wasn’t until a few years of struggling to find my place in New York, that I discovered that I was living the ideal life people dream of when they watch those TV shows. I had found the deep heart connection that nourished me and kept me content and inspired. It came in the form of three incredible friends.
Together, we were two single men, and two single women in our 20s and 30s from different walks of life enjoying the company of each other in a lonely city. We called ourselves the platonic four. Yes, we never dated one another…. We have experienced awkwardness, disagreements, comfort, support, and hysterical laughter, all adding to the perfect friendship. Together, we enjoyed New York City to the max- Adventures in the rain and snow, late night movies, the best burgers in Brooklyn, lazy Sunday afternoons in Central Park, pitchers of sangria over warm conversation, coffee at French Roast, and drinks served by our usual waitress Annelies at Kravas, our favorite bar in Grenwich Village, are just snapshots of what we shared together. They were the ones I went to when my heart was too heavy to describe in words. We understood one another even in the silence.
Saying goodbye to them as I packed up and prepared to move to LA was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I was convinced that things would change, and that the intimacy I shared with them would be lost. I could not have been more wrong. In fact it is quite the opposite. While, we have all changed in the 10 months since I left New York, we have never felt closer. I am forever grateful for the random morning banters over e-mail and the deep and honest stories we are able to share with one another. As we pray and share, we grow deeper in our love for one another. Scott, Kim, and Ashley remain three of the most eligible and inspiring individuals in Manhattan.
Upon every return to New York for a weekend trip of meetings and planning, my time with them is religiously set aside. We come together as if no time has gone by. Their unwavering support makes me feel like a success, their love and acts of sacrifice for me remind me that I am rich when I have them to share my journey with.